Part One My intention was to write an exquisite, precise, highly-calibrated account of the time I arrived at a therapy appointment covered with little green worms. It was to be written in the 1st person with little parenthetical flourishes and jokes. It would build to a breathless climax and end with an ironic punchline. ButContinue reading “Little Green Worms”
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“Joe Here.”
“Joe here,” was the way Joe answered the phone when he was behind his desk at the law offices of Sobchak & Sobchak. “Joe here,” he’d say. Every single time. He never juggled anything up. He was staid and steadfast when it came to telephone etiquette. Joe never flirted with variety. His delivery was deadpan, allContinue reading ““Joe Here.””
The Active Training Sessions
The Active Training Sessions ended with the summer and Jacob hadn’t learned a goddamn thing. Ninja skills dulled. He would meet an attack with clumsy, uncertain moves. Hesitation begets paralysis. Hanging around deserted shopping malls (they’re easy to break into if you possess what old grandfathers referred to as gumption) watching mildew grow in patternsContinue reading “The Active Training Sessions”
Telekinetic Kelly
Kelly Green raised the red flag on her mailbox all the way from the kitchen. She didn’t even have to look out the window this time. She accomplished the feat while sitting at the table eating instant oatmeal. The oatmeal was hot and she liked it thick. It was flavored with brown sugar and mapleContinue reading “Telekinetic Kelly”
The Source of My Anxiety
My wife Susan had a dark streak. She carried herself like the pampered aristocrat she was but insisted she was a Surrealist. She actually told people that. “What do you do?” they’d ask. “I’m a Surrealist,” she’d say. She made Duchampian readymades. I, myself felt like a writer. Susan made things. I made things up.Continue reading “The Source of My Anxiety”
Vasectomy Performed on a Roller Coaster
Kent Coleman owned a collection of fiberglass toy-factory legs. He stole every single one. Smuggled them beyond the factory grounds under his voluminous brown sarape. Kent Coleman bore a striking likeness to actor Judd Hirsch. It was this uncanny resemblance that allowed him to get away with his pathological larceny. No one would suspect aContinue reading “Vasectomy Performed on a Roller Coaster”
The Found Tape
On October 24, 1993, while walking home from school, I found an old audio cassette by the roadside. It was a TDK 90 minute tape. The label on side 2 had been peeled off. About eight inches of tape were tangled and hanging out of the cassette. I managed to wind the tape back upContinue reading “The Found Tape”
The Crooner
The Crooner sat alone in his dressing room. He’d draped an old, stained tablecloth over the mirror and had unscrewed most of the light-bulbs around the frame. Dressing room lights were always too bright and the mirrors captured too many hard memories. He wore his life on his face. He lifted a pint of whiskeyContinue reading “The Crooner”
Buried Skeletal Remains
The Day Before Thanksgiving I am tromping across a frozen swamp this morning, foraging for scatterberries. The gunmetal gray sky is loaded with unreleased snow. It’s predicted to begin lavishing deep inches of the powdery stuff over the whole region today. The heavy hush and stillness that precedes a snowstorm always strikes a rhapsodic chordContinue reading “Buried Skeletal Remains”
Recently Published Stuff
“Baby Box Turtles at the Bottom of a Vodka Bottle” at Blood+Honey Exacting Clam No. 19 Winter 2025 Dada Issue “Unspeakable Dan” at Yellow Mama Webzine “The Car Crash They Saw” at The Broken Teacup “A Path Through the Dandelions” at The Argyle Literary Magazine “Hoover” at Expat Press “Aah-Ahh-Ahh-Chooo!” at Borderline Tales
